Day 2

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

I've never done this before. I've extolled my virtues on various dating sites and job interviews, but this is very different. And love...that is such a strong word. I *like* many things I can think of...my new shortish hair/bangs, my boobs on occasion, my good skin.

But what do I *love*? Is this the same as 'being egotistical about,' do you think? My knowledge of the English language? My ability to kick all asses in the game of Set?

...I don't think so. I feel good about those things, but...they're innate. I don't know if I appreciate them as much as I should. I blatantly look down on those who *don't* have a good handle on English (as many of us do). Somehow that doesn't seem like LOVE to me.

This morning, I finished the audiobook disc I was on (Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex. Cutest book cover EVER), and felt the urge to dance. I reached for the cd-holder, knowing that what I wanted and needed would be right on top. There it was...my little homemade Adam Lambert disc, scratched from many, many uses. I put the disc in, set it to random, and went into another world.

Now, I'm not a music person. I resist new music. I haaaaaate when someone says "Hey, come here, I want to play this song for you." I am resentful and bitter the whole time. I feel held hostage. Like they are interrupting my life for three minutes and expect my full attention, I guess? I don't know. I know it's stupid, though. And I know people are only wanting me to experience what they feel about the song. I am getting better about this with Neil, and as we get to know one another better and better, he's getting to know what sort of songs my picky self really likes...AND how to play them for me more organically. So it's not just me standing there seething with anger.

But...when I *do* find music I like, I'm like anyone else. I can't get enough of it. And with my recent desire to get into drum-playing, and my constant urge to dance to music I'm listening to, even at work, I know I have good rhythm.

So right now...that's what I love. I feel free, and high (I think....drug-free for life and all), and alive, and I love that I can dance, and it can make me go from Grumpy to Fabulous in a minute flat. I feel confident and sexy and even talented, like I have something inside that needs to be explored.

I guess this is kind of a weird answer. I feel weird about it, anyway. But at this moment, it's what I love.



P.S. The cover of Bonk. Something else I love!