The socks have literally flown off my feet. Well, not LITERALLY.

...How come no one ever told me how STINKING charming "Enchanted" is??

(Okay, I guess you did tell me. That's why I DVR'ed it off Starz HD the other day. But how could you have let me wait this long to watch it?)

Top nine reasons I loved it, in Not Necessarily Top Nine order because I Haven't Taken the Time to Rank Them (Spoiler warning):

*Generally, my eyes don't see anything but Scabbers when Timothy Spall is in anything. But I loved him in this, especially at the end when he's signing his books and they show his cutesy author's pose on the cover.

*Susan Sarandon's real-life version of her outfit was to die for. All fancy cobwebs and black iridescence...! Step aside, Bernadette, another beautiful witch has dethroned you.

*I totally appreciated the turn-arounds of both Idina Menzel (almost the only part of "Rent" I don't like, but I bet I'd love her in "Wicked") and James Marsden. Who knew they could pull off a double-whammy of making both seemingly one-dimensional characters (and one-dimensional in very different ways) endearing and kind of wonderful at the end?

*How Giselle made dresses out of curtains without even making sure that was okay with her host

*Of the apparent thousands of Disney references in the film, my favorite has to be that the troll's loincloth was made out of remnants of the Disney princesses' dresses, and his earrings are the shells from Ariel's bikini top. Or maybe that one of the dancers in "That's How You Know" was a chimney sweep in "Mary Poppins." I love "Mary Poppins" best of all. "Love us like a son and daughter/And never smell of bar-ley wa-ter..."

*That Edmund Lyndeck plays the Cranky Old Man. He was Judge Turpin!

You see, sir, a man infatuate with love
her ardent and eager slave
So fetch the pomade and pumice stone
and lend me a more seductive tone
a sprinkling perhaps of French cologne
but first, sir, I think... a shave.

*I LOVE when actors who we don't normally see singing are unexpectedly good at it. Like Gwyneth Paltrow or Nicole Kidman.

*Really cute that the three actresses who voiced Ariel, Belle, and Pocahontas had cameos.

*I'm usually a big old sucker for small, cute animals in animated films (see Petri, Bartok, Scrat), so I figured I'd be completely enamored of Pip by the end. But even with his New York accent, he wasn't my favorite, and I liked that he wasn't--because it allowed me to focus on how cute everything else was. I can't hardly appreciate "Anastasia," for example, because I am always dying for a Bartok scene.

*She's just so....sweet. Who wouldn't fall in love with someone like that? I wish Amy Adams was my friend. And, I mean, I'm a Jim-n-Pam fan. We all are, right? But like...if I re-watch those episodes now, I might be rooting for her just a little bit.

On to real life.

Today was AWES. OME. I worked for a mere three hours, then arranged to leave early (isn't leaving work unexpectedly early so nice? But only when it's for a happy reason or because of the weather or something) to meet with Sarah JC for erranding.

We tackled Shoe Carnival, Linens N Things, Michael's, JCPenney, and Target, and were reasonably successful in all places. Also, when we were nearing Target, the huge military-grade security door was down, and rose just as we came close. When we later asked a Target cashier what was going on, he said "Oh, they were testing the doors or something." Yeah, right. There was totally a bomb scene or a hostage inside that they were told not to tell us about.

Oh, also, I had a YUM YUM YUMMY Insalata Blu with steak (medium) at Macaroni Grill for lunch. (Ems, why's it called "Insalata BLU" when there's no bleu cheese or really anything blue in it? Is it because it's sad? Like, a depressed salad? Because it sure made this mouth happy.)

The rest of my week won't be so great, just mounds and mounds of little things to get done with every moment I have to spare. I grab down-time when I can get away with it, because I don't want to go crazy (and there are plenty of treats just waiting to be enjoyed on the DVR). "Privileged" is a repeat this Tuesday (I think it's the Pilot, so you know what to do, all y'all who haven't seen it yet! The CW, 9 PM, 8 Central!), so I'm glad I have a new favorite to fall back on: "The Ex List." Elizabeth Reaser, I didn't like you in "Gray's," and the thought of you as Esme Cullen makes me have a bad taste in my mouth, but you are seriously fun in your new show. I just don't like the ads where you're sitting in a kiddie pool surrounded by slimy frogs all around your bits.

I'm making Black Angus burgers for dinner tonight. The cashier at Wal-Mart told me I'll never go back to regular after these.

We'll see if she's right.
As always, I'll let you know.

That is some kind of a thing.

I was checking in "Elle Decor" this week at work, and saw that a designer featured in an ad had the first name of "Celerie." Yes, there's an "i-e" at the end, and one of the "e"s may have had an accent ague on it...but essentially, this chick's name is Celery. And that's awesome. (Even though I don't like celery. Too stringy, and the little taste it does have is nasty. Ruins a perfectly wonderful chicken salad.)

So, it's coming. One week from tonight, I'll be married! I have a million things to do, and definitely don't have time to be idly blogging, but I think I need to. Years from now, I'll wonder what I was feeling those days between Ms. Dawson and Mrs. Dazet...right? Right?

Which reminds me. When do I officially stop being a fiancee (Blogger! Allow us to insert symbols, please. It bugs me that I can't put an accent on that 'e'...) and become the bride? And then, when do I stop being a bride and become a wife? "Wife" seems...old. I don't mean to say, married lady-friends reading this, that you seem old. You don't. But for me...calling myself a wife...sounds like my mom. Who's always been older than me. Obviously. Perhaps when I am one, it won't seem like that. I'll let you know, though.

Neil and I have been working and working on next week's events, and though I'm not really overwhelmed, I know I won't be able to fully relax until we leave Dad's house Saturday night, full of pizza and Emily-cakes and sparkly-lemonade with simple syrup. And then there's the reception the week after that to look forward to, and our drive to Youngstown the weekend after that (we totally got the suite instead of the standard room, complete with whirlpool bath--fun!!), and then it's ALMOST CHRISTMAS!!

So, how am I feeling? I'm a bit nervous, bordering on panicky sometimes. This stems from, of course, the miles-long list I rewrite daily (to remind myself of everything that needs doing, and to motivate me to cross things off it), and the worry that I won't get it all done. But seriously, no one's gonna care. Steve's not going to bitch that the outside display of gourds aren't perfectly scrubbed if I don't get them washed thoroughly, for example. I'm also nervous, though, for the actual event. I've never done this! Will it change me? Will I begin taking my darling Neil for granted? Will he turn into a WoW addict who never lets me check my e-mail or, worse, status updates on Facebook? Will nothing change at all? Will I be embarrassed declaring my love for this person in front of 25 people I care about? I am not one to gush over things or be emotional with my family or friends whatsoever; when I called Emily in gasping tears after a recent turn of events shook my world upside-down, she said I hadn't called her crying before, and she was touched I'd turned to her in that moment. Plus, she made Noah laugh into the phone at the end, which made me melt, and cheered me up immensely.

I just...I sometimes think I want to do this alone. Just me and him. No one else, not even an officiant. How else, I think, can it be truly from the heart? We are performing for a crowd, repeating words that's their benefit to hear, even though it's technically for us...I wouldn't say 90% of the things I say to Neil at home, in public where everyone can hear. It's too gooey and silly and, you know--just for us. And if we're confirming our legal commitment of love together, why would we leave that stuff out, that's the essence of our time together?

But then again, maybe that's the very reason for the ceremony. So we can declare this publicly, in front of the one group of people we want to be with to witness it (and those that will be there in spirit). And that's pretty neat, right? I'll never forget Emily singing to Joe (you should have warned me, Em, because, damn), or Braden's smile as he watched Amanda walk to him, or Allen and Deborah's grins as they strode out of the church past us. I was surprised at how emotional I was during those moments, because in all three cases, I was single and felt a little left out of this world of romance. But witnessing something these people chose to share, intimate moments all, made me smile inside and out. And maybe that's what this is all about. Letting people in, for a little while, to see a window to your souls that's normally kind of private. Yeah, it may be a little uncomfortable, but this is the only time we'll be doing this.


So, this coming week in a nutshell:

Sunday: errands, errands, errands. Dad's, maybe. Probably Dad's. Very likely.
Monday: Work 8-1. Darling Sarah JC is coming into town to help me, and I may knock out some more errands shoe- and jewelry-related while she's around.
Tuesday: Work 8-1. Uncomfortable doctor's appointment after. Almost as bad as having a blood test. Tackle to-dos. Meme and Papa due to arrive! (Thank goodness I won't have to call them anything different.)
Wednesday: Work 8-1. Possible lunch out with Corrie and a vendor. Must...stick...to....diet. Set up Fall Display at Dad's. Errands, errands, errands.
Thursday: Work 8-1. Finish as many things as possible before Neil calls. Drive to Fulton, pick him up, then go to Kirkwood to visit with the Marlowes. Steal Lily and Steve back and drive home, probably late.
Friday: Off work. Appointment at noon at Salon Adair with Lily for mani-pedis. Shop with her to get remaining needs, including flowers for my hair from Michael's. Make sure chairs, samovar, and glassware are picked up from US Rents It and Lindsey Rentals. Highlight/trim hair. Dinner with families. Mark arrives. Spend the night at Dad's or Sarah's.
Saturday: Most of day at Sarah's, girly luncheon, doing hair, makeup, dress. Pick up flowers at 2:00 from My Secret Garden. Ensure everything travels to Shelter that needs to be there. Meet Neil at 3:45 for hellos and start of early photo session. 4:40, be at door of schoolhouse to greet. After everyone arrives, the ceremony begins. After ceremony, take more photos at sunset, then go home to change. Meet at Dad's by seven or so for dinner.
Sunday: Trip to Fulton to see Neil's new work with Mark, Meme, and Papa.

Eeeeesh! How much will actually be done in time?? Thinking about it just stresses me out. I also have a manuscript to read. Yeah, that's a priority.

I should have gotten a massage appointment for this week.

Thank goodness this isn't a big-affair wedding. It would be so easy for me to go crazynuts.



Two epiphanies this week:

1. Choosing when to get gas these days is like playing to stock market. Gas went up to $3.39, stayed there awhile, and then a few weeks ago, went down to $3.29. Then, a few days later, $3.19. I had less than a quarter tank left, but I could have held out for a few days (my Corolla gets wicked gas mileage). But I wanted to take advantage of the $3.19 before it went up again. So I filled up.

Two days later, it was down to $2.99.

Then, this weekend, $2.89.

I sold too quick.

2. This may not be an original thought, but it occurred to me how much the seasons of the year are like a single day. Spring is morning, with chilly sunlight and the world beginning anew. Summer is midday, with the hot bright sun overhead, the hottest time of the day. Autumn is sunset, all oranges and goldens and burnished reds, beginning to pave the road for the night...which is totally wintry.

When do I get my laureate prize thing? Because this is serious and deep genius.

An Awesomely Exhausting Day

Saturday, we had big plans.

Our first and probably most entertaining stop was Hartsburg, Missouri. It was a gamble; I had no idea if they'd be selling pumpkins and gourds this early in October. I would have gone next weekend, except it'll look like this:



And as charmed as I am that this happens there every year, I don't necessarily want to be a part of it. So I decided to throw the dice in this Game of Life and nabbed Neil (and a large wheeled tub, just in case) to drive twenty minutes down 63 to see if they might rustle me up some orangey decor this weekend. (I tried to find out beforehand, but I wasn't getting answers...naturally, an article appeared in yesterday's paper--a day too late for my purposes--reporting that they were open.)

As we neared the town, I began to get a bit nervous. "Oh crap," I thought. "What if this town isn't as tiny as I remember it?" Dad always drove, not me, and I am horrible with directions. I don't know right from left, north from south, gravel from paved, etc. If I don't drive regularly in a place, I'm pretty much screwed (and often get lost even then, when I know the place, as well). So I began to wonder if I'd sent us on a wild goose chase both for pumpkins AND the actual place where we might GET pumpkins.

I needn't have worried. Hartsburg consists of two blocks of civilization, and my vague recollection of turning left past the main drag was a correct one. I wondered if the houses I remembered were still standing on that road, or if we'd even find them at all.

We found it, all right--at a house with a sign reading Hackman Produce, right off Main Street. It was entirely familiar to me. The huge, huge rows of gleaming bright orange pumpkins off to the side was as marvelous (if a bit surreal) a sight as I'd ever seen, and the front lawn was liberally covered in butternut squash, funny-looking watermelons (one looked like a huge green kidney bean), bright orange warty gourds with dark green ends, crates full of tiny gourds in every fall color combination imaginable, and pumpkins ranging from cute minis ($0.50) to the hugest pumpkins you have ever seen. You could comfortably ride four people on those things, I swear (and at $25? A seriously good deal).

I had one goal: nothing too normal. I wanted a Yoda gourd (grayish-green ovals with pointy ends that look, sitting flat, like the head of...well, you know) for sure, but they only had one, and it was only sorta-Yoda lookin' (which I got anyway). I spent an inordinate amount of time pawing through the crates of tiny gourds, getting far too carried away (but they were so cheap, it didn't matter). In this, Neil and I are superb matches--he walked up and down the rows of huge pumpkins, waiting for one to call to him, while I gourd-shopped and selected smaller pumpkins.

Y'all, I can't tell you how delightful it was. The weather was FREAKING perfect (high 70s), the shade was plentiful in that beautiful yard, everyone asked why I had such a load and I got to say "For my wedding!", and the price felt like I was getting away with something. Eventually, after an hour or so of meandering and piling and choosing, we loaded up Neil's Subaru...adding two hay bales for good measure. I've never worked with hay bales, and was surprised at their slipperiness (though I shouldn't be. A famous scene in On the Banks of Plum Creek told me long ago that hay is slide-able), but we got 'em in, and the car was loaded to the very top. No kidding, when we removed the bales later on, the car's padded ceiling was covered in hay.

We headed to Dad's house next to drop off our loaded car and tackle the remaining errands. None were as charming and wonderful as the Hartsburg trip, but satisfying all the same. After Neil refueled at Taco Bell with a chicken Cheesy Gordita Crunch and strawberry Fruitista Freeze (we sat in the parking lot and watched revelers walk below us on the MKT toward the Roots N Blues BBQ Fest downtown), we saddled up and visited Hobby Lobby, where we finished up some wedding-supply shopping, picked out some righteous paper napkins (you'll see, they're awesome), and just generally scored. Next was a quick stop at Pier 1, where the day before I'd found an awesome rust-colored metal turtle on clearance, and wanted Neil to check it out. As he was paying MUCH less than and arm and a leg for it, who should also be visiting the store but the wonderful Alla B., and as always, it was a delight to see her.

We were losing steam, but I wanted to get our last stop in...visiting our wedding site at around the same time as the actual wedding. As we were exiting the car at Shelter, a big white truck was letting off its passenger: a bride. A bride in a severely 80's dress, bright white with ruched long tight sleeves, satin everywhere the eye could see, and very, very big poufy brown hair piled on top. I whispered to Neil "Don't worry, honey..I'm not going to look like that."

We walked past Miss Arkansas 1987 through the front gates, and immediately Neil stifled a guffaw. Standing pensively on the foot bridge, awaiting his Vision In Glamour, was the groom. His back was to us, but that was enough...enough to see his spanking-new white tuxedo (WITH TAILS, mind you), gleaming white shoes, and unfortunate turquoise trimmings (the back of the bowtie, specifically). The tux was a little too big for him, which added to its appeal, as far as I'm concerned. I echoed my earlier statement and said in a low voice "...And you're not going to look like that."

We held our breath against the Designer Imposter fragrance he was wearing and scuttled past him to the schoolhouse to plan out our ceremony. For the next few minutes, we discussed chair placement and where things would go and where we'd stand and all that...but our serenity in that haven of one-room education wouldn't last. For Mandi and Derek appeared in the doorway, completely blocking any exit strategy, and we had no choice but to wait until the obligatory "schoolhouse doorway" shots were completed (Oh, I'm not complaining--I want 'em too! Also, I made up their names). When the photographer eventually wrangled her charges inside the schoolhouse, we made our exit...but not before I noticed the poor gentleman was wearing not only a turquoise bowtie, but a glaringly bright vest in the same color...and Neil made the most profound discovery: the presence of makeup on Derek's face. His hair was verrrry carefully gelled within an inch of its life, in spikes that I suppose he was attempting to look artfully mussed.

It was amazing.


Nothing would top this, so we dragged ourselves home to settle in for an evening of Elite XC fighting (all Neil), Mizzou football during the downtimes (both of us, but I wanted it more), Hawaiian pizza from Papa John's (ALL Neil, yuck!), and looking lovingly at one another.

October!

I'm getting married this month. Oh my goodness.

So today was awesome. Uneventful, but awesome. I got so much done.

First, I just finished tomorrow's NYTX...this may be the first time I've done a Thursday without help. I'm getting smarter, people! Either that or Will Shortz wasn't as picky today.

I vacuumed today. This would have been enough by itself to make me proud of my accomplishments today; I hate, hate, hate vacuuming. And here's why:

1. The unplugging and replugging all the time.
2. The need to stop halfway and unload the dust compartment, and to pull all of the hairs out of the brush. It's less gross than doing a house or room where other hairs than my own are going into the vacuum, because I can't handle other people's long hairs.
3. The constant bending over.
4. Ultimate example of getting dirtier when you're trying to clean.
5. I get hot and sweaty, even without the aforementioned dirt.
6. The cord that gets in your way all the time.
7. The fact that after you're done...nothing *really* looks that different.
8. Our vacuum is beginning to make funny sounds. And it smells like burning rubber. Neither of which bode well for its future, I bet.
9. I'm anal; I need to get every spot I can, and I need to know that I haven't missed spots. When you're vacuuming an apartment all carpeted the same, with rooms leading into each other, with computer chairs and dining tables and La-Z-Boys everywhere, I can't go in a straight line and keep track of where I've been, and I can't be *sure* that I've gotten every inch so far. So I end up going over the same area several times just in case I've missed a spot. I also do this because I know I won't be vacuuming again for a very long time, and I want it to count. How would a Roomba know it hasn't gone over the same spot twice?
10. When you're done, the vacuum is filthy. So I feel like I have to wipe it down. Only I'm always too tired and pissed to do so, so I put it away dusty. And that makes me feel like I haven't fully completed the task.
11. My vacuum locks into a 90-degree position so it can stand on its own, and you need to lay down the front for it to go at an angle...which is most of the time during a vacuum job. But it very easily goes into the 'locked' position, which means in the middle of a sweep, suddenly it won't angle anymore. And I have to stop and put my foot on the front so it will be flexible again.
12. Trying to throw away the dust is a bitch, because it kind of clouds up above the trash can...then back onto the floor...and you have to vacuum it all over again. Once, I dropped the dust container right on the floor, making a worse mess. I didn't speak to anyone for hours after that one.

Okay, rant over! October is here!!

I've determined a guaranteed creepy feature, for me, in faces: eyes that are too close together. Case in point: Astros first-baseman Lance Berkman.

{I tried to find a really good image of him at bat...he gives this creepy glare where you can see the whites of his eyes from about a mile away. But no Google Images did it justice.}

Also, can someone please tell me why anyone ever thought chocolate was a good combination with pumpkin? I wouldn't call myself a pumpkin purist, but I do love my pumpkin pie and pumpkin bread, preferably with some sort of creamy topping...and I've been known to enjoy a good pumpkin cheesecake. But pumpkin with chocolate?? No.

Lily called, and Gilbert is starting the MBA program at MU in January! They're moving back at the end of October! So this means our annual Schnucks Thanksgiving shopping trip is NOT in jeopardy!! And we all get to see Lily dance in May! Gilbert never has, I don't think, and neither has Neil. Yippee! (Speaking of Neil...he is having a TERRIFIC first week at work. They got him one of those brand-new iPhones, even! I get his Blackberry when I switch to his plan in December!)


No theme for this entry. Just an update on my day, and on the beginning of the Best Month Ever.

I love everything!

[this reminded me of mama...]

Banned books

So it's Banned Books week, and as a card-carrying librarian, it's my duty to commemorate it somehow. I know I'm very lucky to live in a liberal-ish section of the Bible Belt, where even the public library's computers are left unfiltered, and I've had many lively and heated (and FUN!) online Blackboard discussions during library school about what our role should be in censorship. I am very passionate about leaving books free to be read, but I do think the line should be crossed somewhere; i.e., I don't know how I'd feel if a book on how exactly to commit murder and get away with it was a part of the collection. But also...it's important that librarians don't let their feelings get in the way. A conservative Collection Development librarian can't let his views prevent him from ordering Heather Has Two Mommies, and a liberal librarian in a different library should order that Tucker Carlson book along with the Molly Ivins.

So I always revert to this philosophy: If it's something the community would visit the library for, it's fair game.

In that spirit...here's the American Library Association's 100 most frequently banned books from 1990-2000. I'll italicize the ones I've read, and bold the ones I want to read. And, of course, there will be commentary.

[Just as an intro here...I don't like scary, and I don't like sad. So that'll be the reason I haven't and don't care to read some of these. Also, I have sat through many uncomfortable junior-high sex-ed sessions, so I'm pretty well covered on the basics, so the kiddie sex-ed books probably won't be selected. Not that I have anything against them.]

Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz (Steve had some of these, I think. I may have read two or three before asking myself why I was committing self-torture.)

Daddy's Roommate by Michael Willhoite

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou

The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier (audiobooked this one recently. It was just okay.)

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain ("Rivah...in the rain...." ooh, chills!)

Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck (We discussed this before, remember? Can't handle it!)

Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling (Oh, PLEASE. Don't tell me this promotes witchcraft when they don't ban freakin' fairy tales.)

Forever by Judy Blume ("Ralph" was such an odd name, I thought...but also strangely appropriate.)

Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson (Goes against my 'sad' rule. But it was for school. And it ticked me off how the previews for the movie made no mention of the utter tragedy of this story. How many kids were caught off-guard by that, thinking they were going to see a pretty happy little movie? Woulda scarred me permanently.)

Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman

My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier (I think the kiddos had this one and I read it. Was it with a bike or something? No, no, I'm wrong--just looked it up. I'm thinking of "Mick was Here" or something.)

The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger (of course! Read it for the first time for Language Arts class in 7th grade [Yo Mrs. Sisson, you made me laugh, grrl], and just when I finished the last page, I flipped the pages back and read it through again. Love, love, love.)

The Giver by Lois Lowry (ooh...normally I don't go for Utopian books, but this sounds great. Kinda Uglies-ish.)

It's Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris

Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine (HELL no!)

A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck

The Color Purple by Alice Walker (hold on a sec...this is an epistolary? Oh, HELL yes! Bring it!)

Sex by Madonna (this was actually in MU's Special Collections. One Sunday, I furtively brought it back to my desk and flipped through it. It has a weird metal cover. To be honest, I wasn't that shocked...I probably would have been when it first came out, though. I remember seeing it behind the counter at Waldenbooks, all wrapped up and against-the-rules. This one is nearly impossible to interlibrary loan. Go ahead, try it!)

Earth's Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel (Looks boring. And loooong.)

The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle (This book made me think in ways I had never imagined. I didn't love them as much as other series, but I was fascinated.)

Go Ask Alice by Anonymous (hells no! No drugs.)

Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers (This sounds really interesting...and if it weren't so war-centric, I might read it. But I don't like violence, either.)

In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak (Aw, come on, little boy penises don't count!)

The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard

The Witches by Roald Dahl (I have tried Dahl, but I just don't love him. And I'll never be able to eat regular-sized spaghetti noodles, thanks to Mr. Colman for reading us The Twits in Unit C. If you don't know why...you're better off not knowing.)

The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein

Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry (What?!! Why??)

The Goats by Brock Cole (Holy crap, why have I never heard of this one? This looks terrific!)

Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane (This would be like...a book I'd feel good about reading. But not one I'd pick up on my own.)

Blubber by Judy Blume (I've got it on my goals list to reread every single Blume book. Love u, Linda!)

Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan (this plot intrigues me. I might someday. I don't like dead, though.)

Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam (Um...I have to read this now. This sounds awesome! Maybe I'll buy it for some baby I know.)

We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier (This sounds super! Too disturbing for my reading-mood these days, but I'll get to it.)

Final Exit by Derek Humphry (Wow. Not for me, no, but I think I'm glad it exists.)

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood

Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George (I don't know. I feel like I would have listened with rapt attention had it been read to me, like when Raboo Rodgers read to us from his Magnum Fault at Ridgeway, but I don't think I'd pick it up on my own.)

The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison

What's Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee (Tom's hand makes me want to cry. It's the same thing as sad eyes.)

Beloved by Toni Morrison

The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton

The Pigman by Paul Zindel (This sounds like it would depress me.)

Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard

Deenie by Judy Blume

Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes (No sir. NO SAD ENDINGS!)

Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden

The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar (This sounds adorable!)

Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz (A freaking....a freaking....book about superstitions?? Are you kidding me? I knew this list would made me mad.)

A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein (Okay, he's wicked. But it's a serious tragedy if some kid never got to read him because it was banned.)

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley (No utopias, thank you. But I guess it's one of those 'should-reads.' Maybe I'll make myself read it someday.)

Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice) (tried to read these...way too S&M for me.)

Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole

Cujo by Stephen King

James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl

The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell (Wow...interesting that the author has come out saying he no longer prescribes to the theories he spouts in this one. The book sounds a little like Abbie Hoffmann's Steal This Book)

Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy

Ordinary People by Judith Guest (this one's a maybe. Sounds depressing.)

American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis (I'll never read it. But it's tempting!)

What's Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras

Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret by Judy Blume (I read this one every few weeks for about twelve years. Oh, lawd, I love it!)

Crazy Lady by Jane Conly

Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher

Fade by Robert Cormier (Wow, this sounds cool!)

Guess What? by Mem Fox

The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende (Nah. History, violence, international conflict...no thanks.)

The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney (I did see part of a Lifetime Movie of this starring that chick from "Life Goes On." O-bla-di.)

Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut (The genre, 'absurdist classic,' turns me off immediately. Same reason I couldn't get into Hitchhiker's Guide.)

Lord of the Flies by William Golding (read it for one of our book choices in Block, because Balty was in the movie. Will never forget B.J.'s hilarious commentary when we watched the movie in Hechler's class senior year. I took notes, it was so funny. When I come across them now and again, I laugh out loud.)

Native Son by Richard Wright (Reading it, I thought "Now why does everyone give Communism such a hard time?" I'm so ignorant about that stuff, but that novel sure does give the impression that they're all for equal rights.)

Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women's Fantasies by Nancy Friday (Not for the...um...even mildly prudish.)

Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen

Jack by A.M. Homes

Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya

Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle

Carrie by Stephen King (I might. I've always kind of wanted to read this one.)

Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume (oh, CRAP this is a good book. I don't know if I'll ever be able to read it again, but I had to buy it as soon as I finished reading the library copy.)

On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer (This seems really intense. I wouldn't mind reading it, but I don't really want to.)

Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge

Family Secrets by Norma Klein (ooh, wicked!)

Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole

The Dead Zone by Stephen King

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain

Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison (I've never read any Morrison. Her novels sound sad and disturbing, so that's probably why. I think I have Beloved somewhere, though, from someone's recommendation.)

Always Running by Luis Rodriguez (This sounds really cool, but the reviews are mixed.)

Private Parts by Howard Stern (I didn't want to buy this myself, so when I was out shopping with Emily one day and saw it in the clearance section, I asked if she'd take the money and buy it for me. I'm not offended by it...I just think he's kind of awful.)

Where's Waldo? by Martin Hanford (Oh, because someone found a naked person once? Or something?)

Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene (Another 'maybe.' A lot of "This is really sad" reviews for this one. Not a good sign. How come there aren't any sugary sweet novels on here?)

Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman

Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett (I do like architecture. But not history.)

Running Loose by Chris Crutcher (I think I like sports-themed novels. Never really thought about it, but I always enjoy them.)

Sex Education by Jenny Davis (Wow, this isn't the fluffy rom-com I expected before I read the synopsis)

The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene (Apparently it's "Stephan," ALA. Don't you know anything about books? Also--whoa, this sounds graphic. But I'd like to read it.)

Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy

How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell (yuck yuck yuck!)

View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts (Probably scary, and certainly graphic, but too interesting not to read)

The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder (I am not one for ghost stories. Thanks, Betty Ren Wright.)

The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney

Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier



So here's what's funny to me. Many books on here are, presumably, being banned or protested against because of newish or controversial ideas like homosexuality, sexual situations, birth control, etc; and because of violence and disturbing content. But then there are classics, like Mockingbird and Tom Sawyer, that have long been notorious for their use of racial epithets. I'm trying to think my way through this, but something's wrong here. Like....I get both reasons. But they don't seem to match up, somehow. I think part of it is that some people find the older classics offensive for their use of certain words, but it's not the same as a modern novel dropping the F-bomb. In a way, it's a noble reason to censor a book (though I'm not justifying it). No one would be accused of being a prude for not liking to hear the n-word--it's a good thing to be offended by! And people of other races don't, I feel, have the right to use it, except that when those books were written, it was more acceptable.

Obviously, it's a touchy subject for everyone. This whole post is full of touchiness. But it's the right week for it.

Also, I think it's neat that some of the same authors reappear in the list. It's like they were all "You can't hold me back, censors! I WILL WRITE AGAIN!"

A Freakishly Productive Day, Considering

I can't believe how motivated I was today. I felt like I had to keep going and going...not through any sense of obligation, but because I wanted to feel satisfied by doing so. I wish that happened more often! I'd probably burn a crapload more calories.

Here's what I did, after working 5 hours this morning:

>Peeled, washed, and PICKLED 27 eggs. Also some sausages. I know....weird, right? But they're so expensive to buy, and I'm so Susie Homemaker these days, so why not? I even have pickling spices and pickling salt!

>Loaded, unloaded, and reloaded the dishwasher.

>Made turkey burgers for dinner, with Oopsie rolls...another good experience with those. I'm religious about my turkey burger toppings: regular mustard and hamburger dills...not those long sandwich pickles that all the kids are eating these days. The little bright green rounds. That's it. Thank you, cleochatra, for bringing Oopsies to my life!

>Put in an hour or so of ChaCha work.

>Our DVR is getting full, so I was determined to eliminate. I watched and got rid of NKOTB on The Today Show (eh. But, I've never heard Jon talk as much as he did there); Stephenie Meyer on Ellen (double eh. She was only on there to give away her books. She's not even fun!); last week's Hills; Desperate Housewives (THIS SEASON IS GOING TO BE AWESOME!!); Rock the Reception (hey, gimme a break, Poison was going to show up); and the series premiere of Privileged. Which completely rocked. So much so, that I went online and watched the next two episodes. Holy Gilmore, it was like being in Emily and Richard's house again, complete with a sassy heroine, her innocent-looking charge, and somewhat inappropriate commentary. Rienne, you should totally try it!

>Deposited three checks...I know this doesn't sound like much of a chore, but for some reason, like getting gas, I never like doing it. I put it off as long as possible.

>Got Trevor's address to re-send his invite. You can hear him fairly shrieking in his messages.

>Pre-prepared the kitchen for tomorrow's pot roast, probably my current favorite dinner. The crock pot, skillet, onion, and garlic are out and ready, and the actual meat is thawing in the sink.

>Took a shower the night before! I hardly ever do that, even though I always think I should. Tomorrow morning won't be a flurry of 'crap crap crap I have so much to do'!

>Packed some scrapbooking supplies away, and moved all the boxes in the bedroom away from the bed. It's a pet peeve, if you must know.

>Talked to Lily for a bit, who has picked out the cutest, cutest, retro-ish dress for the wedding.

>Okay, so I'm not going to bed before eleven. Or midnight. Or maybe even one, as it's seven til right now. But I'm going now. I swear!

Running through my head, running through my head

That Tatu song was pretty good. Whatever happened to them? That video was so holocaust-y.

-Some mornings, nothing's better than a cold can of soda first thing. Mother taught me to be obsessive about cleaning the rim before drinking (which makes total sense...we don't put our lips on anything else that hasn't been washed, to our knowledge).

-Although this week has gone by a little slowly, it's been a good one. I was alone at work, and was able to move at my own pace with very little interruption.

-Neil and I opened our first official wedding present tonight! We had a little meeting at our newly repurposed-for-its-original-purpose dining room table, and tore into it.

-The week was pretty eventful: Neil accepted a job offer at Westminster, and we met with our officiant Kristin, both within a few hours of each other. It was a fantastic afternoon, first with the great news (he starts tomorrow!), then sitting for a couple hours talking about our relationship with a family friend who has the power vested in her to marry us. At the end, she said "I approve!" just like a real interview!

-Lately, I've been craving historical romances, with tons (had to look that up the first time I read one) and calling cards and large manor estates in the country for the holidays. I never liked them before working for Harlequin, and I don't usually read them unbidden, but for some reason I feel like being transported to another era. Well, either that or just a nice sugary holiday romance novel with crisp air and scarves (outside only, please. I'll never understand indoor scarves).

-It's getting close now. Less than three weeks! September seemed to go by in a flash of worry and cool temperatures and flashes of good, and now it's almost October. Will I get everything done in time? Will I go into Panic Mode again, or is that behind us? Will I manage to stay on the low-carb track until October 18? I dunno...I told Neil I was getting a G&D's pizza if I get the Jeff City job!!

-Neil did an awesome rearrangement-job this week, putting Phoenix in the second bedroom (he's a total loner, and we suspect he may not like being in a high-traffic area out here), the big TV up high on the media cabinet, the desk relocated to the living room (where it's less isolated, which I like), and the aforementioned dining table in its rightful place, with all four chairs around it. We can play games again!

-It's been a major TV week. I'm saving "Ugly" and "Desperate" for...I don't know, for when I won't be interrupting football, but we of course caught "The Office" on Thursday, then re-watched it on Friday. I don't know exactly what I even thought of it! I certainly wasn't satisfied, and felt so many questions were left unanswered that should have been addressed (why was Meredith's face absolutely covered in red welts for two weigh-ins, then suddenly was clear for the rest? This had BETTER be in the deleted scenes, Universal!)...I didn't like Ryan's return, but then, I stopped liking him when he was so mean to Kelly. I wondered why they stopped the Kevin-retardo joke, because it was absolutely so perfect; I wondered about Michael and Jan's relationship, and why did Jim say Michael had told everyone the baby was his, then said "Who's your daddy? We don't KNOW!" to her stomach in front of everyone...and why the hell was she the same size as the season finale, when it was a month later...and what was up with making us think Pam was flirting with the doughy guy? Only to shock us even more at the proposal? (Okay, that proposal kinda made up for everything.) All I know is, Michael looks like a jack-hole with a goatee. But it does a surprising amount of good to Dwight's square-ass face.

-Sorry for the ramble-rant.

-In "yum" news, I'm this minute eating Lime 'n Chili Blue Diamond Bold almonds. Also, Lily and I were talking about low-carb (Gilbert is doing it too! Welcome to 2003, future lil-bro-in-law! Glad to have you), and she mentioned how delicious the Crystal Light On-The-Go Lemonade was, and I was all "No, Lily, I don't do anything resembling Country Time" and she was all "Dude, stop being unreasonable, try it" and I was all "Are you telling me you won't come to the wedding if I don't?" and she was all "I mean, I didn't want to have to pull that, but yeah" and I was all "I was once witness to a fatal accident involving Crystal Light and a scimitar, so I actually have psychological reasons for not trying it" and she was all "That's your tough luck, unless you want to go get our Sister-Bonding mani-pedis alone the day before you get married" and so I bought some because I don't like going places alone. And it is DELICIOUS!!

-Y'all will flip when you see the floor Dad's laying for the porch. I suggested the "Snickerdoodle" paint chip to accompany, so we'll see if I get my way. Who doesn't love a nice soft snickerdoodle?

-Gerbes was out of garlic tonight! Have you ever heard of such a thing? I had to buy the prepackaged bag of like three heads or whatever. I only needed one, so it was quite painful. They did, however, have the hugest, greenest artichokes I'd ever seen at $3 a pop. I lurrrrrrve artichokes!! (But not stuffed, and not with butter. Only mom and dad's mayo-with-lemon-juice, -and-other-ingredients-I'm-not-sure-of sauce will do)

-Good luck this upcoming week to:
Paul and his family...with so many unanswered questions, I hope some get resolved soon!
Neil, at his new job!
Lily and Gilbert--I hope good news comes for you!
Me, gosh dang it! (I should hear back about the position...they said it would be about two weeks)